Movie Review: LIFE [2017]

LIFE is a dark movie about death. Violent and inevitable death.

Oh, the joys of living on The International Space Station (ISS) with people on earth trying to micromanage your every move but, at the same time, couldn’t help you find your toothbrush.  These scientists are delighted to be living on the ISS answering the questions of elementary school children about where they shit.

Spoilers below. Continue reading “Movie Review: LIFE [2017]”

The CW's The 100 is…

...Lord of the Flies. The 100 is about a far future where humanity lives on a space station and they send all the delinquent youths back to Earth to determine is the planet is habitable. … Um, they’ve proven they can’t be trusted so you send them on an important mission to see if earth was survivable? Good plan.

Murphy’s Law
Kill the pig!

All the 100 have these wristbands that monitor their vitals and let the folks up on the space station know they’re alive and thriving or dying slowly. Of course the take-charge psycho realizes you can just take the wristbands off and  let the people who “sent then down to die” think they’re dead and dying.

There’s like one black guy and he’s the noble voice of reason. While their leader is all “they’ll make us prisoners and poor again.”

But reason, neither heartfelt nor rage-filled, won’t do much when they have to face Grounders! Whats? People who stayed on Earth and survived by adapting and becoming something no longer human…

Murphy’s Law
We have fundamental, moral differences. Being good is right! Being bad is fun!

So there are a bunch of youths running around on the surface being total assholes while monsters lurk. Some want to be good, some want to be bad. That’s essentially the plot. Also, that’s essentially the plot of Lord of the Flies.

They’re nerds, bullies, brats, and followers. There’s cool kids picking on losers, noble and strong kids trying to do the right things, and a bunch of expendable others to either punch or defend.

There isn’t a conch … actually, the one guy who decided to be in charge has a gun and everyone else has shanks.

We're up here, and they're down there. We should kill people up here so people up here can live. I disagree...
We’re up here, and they’re down there. We should kill people up here so people up here can live.
I disagree…

The unique (and only interesting) aspect is the people on The Arc (Get it? like Noah’s.) trying to survive and figure out what’s going on. The council keeps talking able a culling and the engineers are noticing that that drop ship that was ejected because of a serious malfunction didn’t leave any damage and no one’s heard from any of the prisoners who are under some mysterious quarantine.

Humanity is screwed from above and below. I’m currently rooting for the Grounders to kill the 100 and the engineers to use the fact that they’re THE ENGINEERS on a SPACE STATION to their advantage.

 Here’s the super-long official summary of The 100:

 

Because The CW...
Because The CW…

Ninety-seven years ago, nuclear Armageddon decimated planet Earth, destroying civilization. The only survivors were the 400 inhabitants of 12 international space stations that were in orbit at the time. Three generations have been born in space, the survivors now number 4,000, and resources are running out on their dying “Ark” – the 12 stations now linked together and repurposed to keep the survivors alive. Draconian measures including capital punishment and population control are the order of the day, as the leaders of the Ark take ruthless steps to ensure their future, including secretly exiling a group of 100 juvenile prisoners to the Earth’s surface to test whether it’s habitable. For the first time in nearly a century, humans have returned to planet Earth. Among the 100 exiles are Clarke, the bright teenage daughter of the Ark’s chief medical officer; Wells, son of the Ark’s Chancellor; the daredevil Finn; and the brother/sister duo Bellamy and Octavia, whose illegal sibling status has always led them to flaunt the rules. Technologically blind to what’s happening on the planet below them, the Ark’s leaders – Clarke’s widowed mother, Abby; the Chancellor, Jaha; and his shadowy second in command, Kane – are faced with difficult decisions about life, death and the continued existence of the human race. For the 100 young people on Earth, however, the alien planet they’ve never known is a mysterious realm that can be magical one moment and lethal the next. With the survival of the human race entirely in their hands, THE 100 must find a way to transcend their differences, unite and forge a new path on a wildly changed Earth that’s primitive, intense and teeming with the unknown.

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Are you excited about After Earth?

After Earth, starring (Will and) Jaden  Smith as warrior types from the future who crash land on Earth hundreds of years after humankind flees from it.

The thing is, I really wanted to see it then I googled it and realized it’s and M. Night Shyamalan movie and all my hope drained away. M Night makes amazing trailers but really shitty movies– all featuring ridiculous twists. I watched The Happening in theaters and left feeling confused and a little offended.

Am I so stupid that I  would find it plausible that even in a scifi movie -SPOILER- trees would attack humans  in a war-like scenario with no plan then stop with no concessions made?

So a lot of effort had been made to avoid linking M. Night to the movie overtly which isn’t surprising when you look at the poll on the LAtimes.com where 66% (at the time of publication) of readers are less likely to watch After Earth because it’s directed by M. Night Shyamalan.

I still think the trailer looks amazing and I’ll add it to my list of movies to watch on Netflix streaming (don’t even want the DVD by mail) but I think the 12% on Rotten tomatoes might be more accurate than the  trailer.

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PAX 2012 | 3 Reasons FIREFALL is best consumed outside of the game

This week in the real world

5 Reasons Earth Might be Invaded by Aliens

One of the many possible types of possible apocalypses is the vague and terrifying Invasion by Aliens.

Aliens might invade Earth for a number of reasons. These reasons might be tactical, commercial, political, evolutionary, or simply expansionary.

Continue reading “5 Reasons Earth Might be Invaded by Aliens”

Post-apocalyptic survival: He who controls the water isn’t thirsty

The other day, I watched the animated movie Rango. While I was watching, a few things occurred to me:

  1. The desert bears an uncanny resemblance to a post-apocalyptic wasteland (assuming, of course, that the apocalypse is something that turns Earth into a dry, barren, dusty wasteland with very little food and water)
  2. A Wild West type of settlement is apparently the best kind of settlement for this kind of environment (The Book of Eli had something similar)
  3. He who controls the water controls the settlement (and, you know, isn’t thirsty)

The biggest difference between the movie’s desert animals and real-life post-apocalyptic survivors is that survivors aren’t likely to stumble upon Las Vegas’ water supply. If Earth does become a barren wasteland, I’d guess that water will be rare everywhere. I highly doubt people will be finding old, intact water supplies.

Continue reading “Post-apocalyptic survival: He who controls the water isn’t thirsty”