It’s a nasty little fact that if you’re in a survival situation and you’re desperate for food, you’re going to have to eat insects. They’re high in protein and nutrients. I know, I know, your pampered little stomachs are in revolt at the very idea. Well, I’m going to ask you: Whats better? Eating an insect or slowly starving to death? Thought so.
By the way, if you chose starving? You’re an idiot.
Tag: apocalypse
Skills you'll need in the post apocalypse
A couple weeks ago, Ann wrote about post apocalyptic jobs. To do any job well, you’ll need a certain skill set. (Well, in theory, anyway.) Which is great for people who, you know, have skills that translate well in the post apocalypse. So people who have speed and endurance, people who can live in the wilderness of wherever for unknown lengths of time, people who can cook meals with random ingredients, and people who can break other people in half like twigs will probably have a leg up on everybody else. You know, like the people who sit in front of a computer all day (unless the post apocalypse has a lot of computers in it; in which case, there might be hope for me).
But let’s think about our individual (present) skills for a moment, shall we? Why? Well, because these are the skills that we’ll take with us into the post apocalypse, should the apocalypse happen tomorrow, next week, or December 21, 2012.
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Maintaining a healthy relationship post-apocalypse
In most of the western world romantic love is the ideal. From day one we are told it will conquer all, that there is a specific kind of ‘true’ love that overwhelms all obstacles and ensures your safety and happiness. This is a lie. Love exists, but a happy and successful relationship post-apocalypse will need a lot more than just love. I decided to talk about how to keep yourself- and your relationship- alive and healthy in the hellish future.
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Lets talk for a bit about the sort of love we’re told to expect by the media. This love is wild, dramatic. It happens when two people who seem to really dislike each other meet in a stressful circumstance. Regardless of how incompatible they are, they fall in love, which makes it great. Because that totally works in real life. If you’ve had more than one or two relationships I shouldn’t need to tell you this is nonsense. That kind of ‘love’ rarely lasts, and is rarely healthy or supportive when it does. More to the point, if required to survive, it will get you killed.
Picture this. You are hunting for food. Just you and your lover. Awww. But you disagree on which way to go! Your hollywood-approved belligerent sexual tension means you argue, and snipe at each other over which way to go. You’re distracted- so distracted you don’t hear the threat sneaking up on you. BAM. You’re now slaves to a set of raiders. How could you have solved this? Well, several ways, but for the purposes of this post we’ll talk about the ideal Apocalypse survival relationship skills.
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Celebrating birthdays in the post apocalypse
Bugs in the post-apocalypse
So, I hate bugs. (All bugs, including spiders, which may or may not be considered a bug.) Unfortunately, I’ve been battling an ant invasion for the last few months, so I’ve got bugs on my mind. The crazy little buggers keep coming back, which is driving me up the wall. I’ve also found grasshoppers and spiders wandering around, too. (Have I mentioned I have a phobia of bugs—especially spiders? Yeah, even lady bugs terrify me.)
The Apocalypse- ONLINE!
There are plenty of survivalism blogs out there- you can see a few of the best in our links folder- but in general they’re very serious. You may have guessed by now that while we’re serious about surviving the end days, we’re a little more focused on the post-apocalyptic living bit. We’re sort of a post-apocalyptic lifestyle blog at this stage, and we’re OK with that.
And as a result of that focus, I’ve become a bit obsessed with online post-apocalyptia. By which I don’t mean the other survivalist blogs, I mean people tweeting and blogging as if they already live in an apocalypse. I love these. I love them so much.
Pre-Apocalypse Fun: Impact Earth
While I think the apocalypse will arrive as a result of us blowing ourselves up or allowing a fancy new designer virus that turns everyone into zombies to fall into the wrong hands, I’ve always been partial to The End coming as a result of an asteroid impact. (Well, that and alien invasion. What can I say, I’m a science fiction geek.
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I think it puts the human race in a slightly better light, since we wouldn’t have offed ourselves as a result of someone’s inability to play well in the sandbox. However, I also don’t think anyone’s going to be able to drill a hole in the middle of this large flying object and put a nuke in it so that it blows itself up (yes, Armageddon, I’m looking at you).
Apocalyptic Fiction: The Fold by Irina Goodwin
How curious, persistent and human, this desire to survive.
It started with my little brother collapsing into his cereal one morning. We were terrified because there’d been a serious bug going around school; of course our immediate thought was that he was seriously ill. We fussed and he got up, went to the kitchen sink and threw up violently but the moment my mother laid a hand on his shoulder he grabbed it and twisted, her fingers and wrist cracking horribly out of position and he bit down on her arm…
That’s how it started for us, though of course it was happening everywhere. I don’t really want to go into the details of what happened to my family suffice to say that they’re no longer with me. I ran and hid and I’ve been running and hiding ever since, avoiding anyone who looked even slightly unwell, and collecting weapons as I went. Continue reading “Apocalyptic Fiction: The Fold by Irina Goodwin”
Post-apocalyptic Healthcare
Last week, my three year old daughter had some awesome and fun medical adventures that required a trip to emergency and a few trips to the doctor’s office.
While I was taking my daughter back and forth from the ER to the doctor’s office (and back to the doctor’s office), I thought about what healthcare would be like post apocalypse. My daughter needed staples to close up a nasty gash on her head and antibiotics to combat an infection. Today, we can get that kind of treatment. But what about during the chaotic days immediately after the apocalypse?
There will probably be first aid and/or emergency stations, at least in the beginning. I’m sure that, regardless of what actually happens, people will be injured and will die during the apocalypse. I’d like to think that there will be places those people can go to get help.
Apocalyptic Video Game: ARMY OF DARKNESS DEFENSE (iOS)
Because I click almost every link I encounter[1. Yes, this has brought me to some strange places. No, I don’t get viruses; I practice safe clicking.], I discovered the most amazingly fun (and free) game on my iPod via an advertisement! A semi-side-scrolling, pseudo beat-em-up, defense game called Army of Darkness Defense. … Why yes, the game is based on the famously camp B-movies staring Bruce Campbell.
Army of Darkness Defense features characters from the Army of Darkness movie, such as Ash (including voice over quotes), Lord Arthur, and Duke Henry.
You play as Ash (and some kind of war god who controls the Smithy and makes the troops come) leading the charge of good guys defending the Necronomicon against the charge of the Deadite Army. Continue reading “Apocalyptic Video Game: ARMY OF DARKNESS DEFENSE (iOS)”