Become a Post-Apocalyptic Success Story in Some Easy Steps

Posted on by tavia.

Want to get rich quick at the end of the world? Stock up on shit nobody needs. Seriously. After six months of roughing it and cowering in fear and smelling something foul every time you sit down or raise your arm,  you’d do just about anything for a hint of comfort.

The key is, people can and will do without most of the amenities they have access to in daily life. People don’t need delicious food but they travel, and search, and pay and wait just to get what might be delicious food. People don’t need most things, but they want so, so much stuff.

This is where you come in. Smart people pack what they need or what they can carry. They have rations, MREs, bottled water, antiseptic spray and the like.You, my entrepreneurial friend, you will have random shit nobody needs but everybody wants.

Continue reading “Become a Post-Apocalyptic Success Story in Some Easy Steps”

Your apocalypse survival starter kit

Posted on by char

I live in a hurricane zone. Which is fun and all–at least, until a hurricane actually hits. I wasn’t affected by Hurricane Irene, and the only thing we got from Tropical Storm Lee was a bunch of wind and some (much-needed) rain.

So far, we’ve been pretty lucky that way. (Of course, the season’s not over yet.)

With the recent evacuation of much of the American Eastern Seaboard, I thought about my family’s own hurricane evaluation plan. You know, just in case we need it. It didn’t take long to think about, since we don’t actually have a plan in place. (Which will most certainly bite us in the ass should we actually need to run far away from an angry mass of hurricane.)

But that’s beside the point. (And a scenario to which my procrastinating self says, “I’ll cross that washed-out bridge when I get to it.”)

Continue reading “Your apocalypse survival starter kit”

It's all gone a bit dystopian out there.

Posted on by anninyn

This is going to be an unusually serious post. I debated saying anything- I haven’t touched previous political hot issues, because I don’t think that’s what this blog is about.I also don’t like the sense that in some way I may be profiting (not monetarily, we get nothing for this site, but in terms of new readers) from these awful occurences. But this particular disaster not only hits close to home, but also brings the advice we give here into sharp relief. We may not present our information in a serious way, we may think that serious survivalists will get almost nothing from our site: But we genuinely want you to surive disasters of all kind, and if something we can say can help, we’ll be very glad. So here it goes.

Continue reading “It's all gone a bit dystopian out there.”

Learning to Live With Small Inconveniences Now Will Pay Off Big in a Post-Apocalyptic World

Posted on by tavia.

Husband and I both had buffalo chicken for dinner. His was boneless, mine had bones. He sees no point in chicken with bones.

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I’m not totally sure why I like it. However, I do know that come world’s end, no one will be de-boning your chicken for you. You’ll need to get on board with tearing flesh from bone like a predator or get hip to eating grass and the like.

Chicken and other meats having bones is one of many little inconveniences you’ll have to deal with. Thing is, where the fuck do you find chickens? In addition, if you currently know where to find a chicken, I’m sure they’re not smart enough to save themselves. You’ll either have to save the chicken or go back and hope it’s still there. They’re not like dogs, they won’t wait for you.

However, if you’re smart, and you find a chicken, you’ll be smart enough not to slaughter it immediately. Chickens make eggs[1. Don’t worry about chicken eggs being filled with chickens. Chickens only make chickens if they’re exposed to male chickens (roosters or cocks, depending on where you’re from). Otherwise, they’re just eggs that can be stolen and eaten]. Eggs are food. You can have a dozen eggs a month or one chicken for one day. Small inconvenience, big pay off. Also, a lot of people are particular about eggs. The smell, the texture.. Personally, I love eggs. Get over it or eat grass.

Continue reading “Learning to Live With Small Inconveniences Now Will Pay Off Big in a Post-Apocalyptic World”

Knitting: A post-apocalyptic skill you MUST learn.

Posted on by anninyn

I’ve decided to learn how to knit. Not just because I want to make my own bloody scarves, but because I think it will be useful.

Of course, to the people who get a little concerned about me when I start yammering on about the end of the world, I’m pointing out the accepted benefits- it’s relaxing, it keeps your hands busy so you snack less, you get a pretty jumper out of the deal, learning new skills keeps the brain sharp- but as with all things, I’m mainly thinking about it’s usefulness post apocalypse.

Continue reading “Knitting: A post-apocalyptic skill you MUST learn.”

The pre-apocalypse apocalyptic library

Posted on by char

So, I’m a geek. (This isn’t news.) But because I’m geeky and would be a professional student if I could get paid for it, it’s no surprise that I like to read up on things. Partly so I have more useless trivia to spout during really awkward dinners with my in-laws, but partly so I’m prepared for all sorts of random things.

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Routine Will Keep You Alive in the Post-Apocalypse

Posted on by tavia.

ann would punch me in the face if I missed another week. We’ve got a schedule and I fail to stick to it.

If I was supposed to patrol every other night to ensure no baddies encroached on my camp, I’d be dead by my third turn. I’d forget what day of the week  it was by day four. But I am trying.

I don’t have anything to write about so I’m going to throw a bunch of links and resources at you.

1.  Nerve-Flu Pandemic Contest 

The AChE (Nerve) Flu Pandemic is part of a “viral” campaign to promote our short film, and to raise awareness for ourKickstarter Campaign (http://kck.st/o8eDB4) to raise funds for our budget.

Within the universe of our film, the Nerve-Flu Pandemic caused mass-hysteria and brought the world’s societies crumbling down. The interesting twist is, as in reality, the pandemic was a work of fiction… it never existed.

JOIN THE CAMPAIGN
Help us spread the rumor of the Nerve-Flu Pandemic and we will give you a very special reward, being listed in the credits of our film as “Bringers of the Apocalypse”.

We already got someone posting a buzzfeed link about it on our Facebook group. Continue reading “Routine Will Keep You Alive in the Post-Apocalypse”

So, you're stuck eating insects.

Posted on by anninyn

It’s a nasty little fact that if you’re in a survival situation and you’re desperate for food, you’re going to have to eat insects. They’re high in protein and nutrients. I know, I know, your pampered little stomachs are in revolt at the very idea. Well, I’m going to ask you: Whats better? Eating an insect or slowly starving to death? Thought so.
By the way, if you chose starving? You’re an idiot.

Continue reading “So, you're stuck eating insects.”

Skills you'll need in the post apocalypse

Posted on by char

A couple weeks ago, Ann wrote about post apocalyptic jobs. To do any job well, you’ll need a certain skill set. (Well, in theory, anyway.) Which is great for people who, you know, have skills that translate well in the post apocalypse. So people who have speed and endurance, people who can live in the wilderness of wherever for unknown lengths of time, people who can cook meals with random ingredients, and people who can break other people in half like twigs will probably have a leg up on everybody else. You know, like the people who sit in front of a computer all day (unless the post apocalypse has a lot of computers in it; in which case, there might be hope for me).

But let’s think about our individual (present) skills for a moment, shall we? Why? Well, because these are the skills that we’ll take with us into the post apocalypse, should the apocalypse happen tomorrow, next week, or December 21, 2012.

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ROBOT UPRISING [a handy guide, just in case.]

Posted on by tavia.

So there’s this book, by Daniel H. Wilson, “How to Survive a Robot Uprising“. In the words of Laurie Beth Dimberg: This is vital information for your everyday life.

This could one day replace the Bible as the most read and referenced book in the world.  In the future, no one will be wondering which berries are safe to eat or who Abraham’s son was. They will, however, want to know How to Spot a Rebellious Robot Servant, or How to Spot a Hostile Robot.

Why? Because Robots will be everywhere, and they eat old people’s medicine for fuel.

Personally I like to believe in a world where humans and robots get along in a healthy prosperous society with hover-cars, time travel, and a few noteworthy space bandits.

I also like to believe that when the vampires and werewolves reveal themselves as an under culture we only nightmared about there will only be a few riots and no cataclysmic power struggle.

But, just in case shit gets technological and then goes awry, buy, or just look into it: \\\ ROBOT UPRISING ///.

small but mighty.