Apocalypse Mindsets Unleashed: Navigating the End with Swagger

Hey there, post-apocalyptic pioneers! So, the world is about to hit the fan, and you’re pondering, “What’s my apocalypse mindset?” Fear not, because we’re diving into the realm of survival philosophies with a dose of humor, confidence, and just a hint of madness. Buckle up, because we’re about to explore different mindsets in the post-apocalyptic world – casual, comedic, and confidently crafted.

  1. The Optimist: Pros: Glass half full, anyone? The optimist sees a barren wasteland and says, “Great, more room for activities!” Positivity might attract fellow survivors, and the sunny outlook can be contagious. Cons: Ignoring the harsh reality might lead to unexpected encounters with zombies or overly aggressive mutant squirrels. Not every post-apocalyptic creature is a cuddly friend.

  2. The Pessimist: Pros: Prepared for the worst at all times, the pessimist won’t be caught off guard. Expectations are low, so any day without a zombie bite is a good day. Cons: Constantly predicting doom might be a bit of a downer. Also, good luck forming alliances when your mantra is, “We’re all doomed, so why bother?”
  3. The Realist: Pros: Balancing optimism and pessimism, the realist sees the world as it is. This mindset thrives on practicality, making decisions based on actual circumstances rather than wishful thinking.

    Cons: Might come off as a party pooper when the optimist is planning a post-apocalyptic picnic. Sometimes, a bit of whimsy is just what the wasteland needs.
  4. The Survivalist: Pros: Ready for anything, the survivalist has a bug-out bag for every occasion. From a zombie attack to a sudden alien invasion, they’ve got the tools and the know-how.



    Cons: Might spend more time prepping than actually enjoying the post-apocalyptic world. Also, the constant smell of camo and dehydrated meals might not be the most attractive aroma.

  5. The Nomad: Pros: Embracing a wanderlust mindset, the nomad roams the wasteland, discovering new places and avoiding the pitfalls of settling in one location. Cons: Lack of a permanent home means limited resources and a constant sense of impermanence. Plus, finding good Wi-Fi for post-apocalyptic Netflix can be a real struggle.
  6. The Community Builder: Pros: Recognizing strength in numbers, the community builder seeks to establish a thriving post-apocalyptic society. Cooperation, shared resources, and a sense of unity are the cornerstones. Cons: The inevitable group drama, disputes over canned goods, and the occasional power struggle can make establishing a utopian wasteland harder than it sounds.
  7. The Lone Wolf: Pros: Independent and self-sufficient, the lone wolf relies on no one but themselves. Stealthy, resourceful, and with a knack for survival, they navigate the wasteland on their own terms. Cons: Loneliness, limited support in tight spots, and the lack of a second opinion when deciding whether that suspicious-looking mushroom is edible. Sometimes, a buddy system isn’t such a bad idea.
  8. The Philosopher: Pros: Seeking deeper meaning in the apocalypse, the philosopher reflects on the nature of existence, survival, and the profound questions that arise in a post-apocalyptic world. Cons: May get lost in existential musings while a zombie horde is closing in. Also, trying to discuss the meaning of life with mutants might not be as rewarding as anticipated.
  9. The Joker: Pros: Finding humor in the darkest of times, the joker uses laughter as a coping mechanism. Quick-witted and always ready with a quip, they lighten the mood in the midst of chaos. Cons: Might not be taken seriously in critical situations. Also, not everyone appreciates a stand-up routine when zombies are at the door.
  10. The Strategist: Pros: Master of tactics and planning, the strategist calculates every move. From fortifying a shelter to orchestrating a coordinated attack on a nest of mutants, this mindset is all about outsmarting the apocalypse. Cons: Sometimes, overthinking can lead to missed opportunities. Flexibility is key, and the best-laid plans might need a few improvisations along the way.

There you have it – a light-hearted exploration of post-apocalyptic mindsets.

Whether you’re cracking jokes in the face of mutants or meticulously planning your nomadic journey, remember that the key to surviving the end is a healthy dose of confidence, a pinch of humor, and the flexibility to adapt to whatever the wasteland throws your way. So, choose your mindset, embrace the madness, and swagger into the post-apocalyptic sunset with the confidence of someone who knows that, no matter what, the adventure is just beginning. Happy survival, wasteland wanderers!

The apocalypse: a sudden apocalyptic event or a slow decline?

I generally think about the apocalypse happening in one sudden apocalyptic event that takes everyone by surprise. But what if it doesn’t happen that way? What if the apocalypse is a slow, years-long decline?

After all, in some ways, the fall of the Roman Empire could be considered an apocalyptic event. And the empire’s decline took a long time, since it technically didn’t fall until Constantinople fell in 1453 (though, okay, the Western Roman Empire was in serious decline and almost completely taken over by Germanic tribes by the end of the 5th century).

Anyway. A slow decline or a sudden event—what’s better? Personally, I don’t know. They’ve each got their pros and cons. Let’s go over them quickly, so we can all secretly hope for one kind over the other.

Continue reading “The apocalypse: a sudden apocalyptic event or a slow decline?”

The Pros and Cons of Post-Apocalyptic Cults

I spent (and am still spending) the week at a giant national training mandated, organized, and run by my job. As I sat in theback of the auditorium and listened to people chant and cheer and say motivational things to one another and generally embrace the corporate culture, my mind began to wander.

What if motivational culture, structure, schedules, and tradition we all that some people brought with them through to the post-apocalyptic world. These things are what make many difficult situations tolerable. There is a shared language and bonding in the quirkiness and need for these tools.

However, if the situation did not call for these tools and the person on stage was not a motivational speaker but a tyrannical misanthrope, we’d have ourselves a cult [1. I have a very active imagination…].

I wondered what this would look like if that hypothetical tyrant on stage was speaking, not to employees, but to survivors. What would it look like, or even feel like if this was how every morning started before your rations were handed over. Many of your needs would be covered, from food to socialization and your survival would be based on community membership. The leader doesn’t even need to be a tyrant [2. but it’s more fun to think he is], Your leaders could simply be false prophets, motivational speakers, sales folk, a resourceful marketing team, a boy band, a cheer squad, or some other individual or small group with both charisma and a respect-demanding demeanor. Continue reading “The Pros and Cons of Post-Apocalyptic Cults”

The family bomb shelter: yay or nay?

During the apocalypse, you’ll have to consider how to protect your family.

This is especially true if you have children. The apocalypse is sure to be filled with chaos (not to mention things exploding and people shooting at each other), and protecting yourself—let alone your family—could be difficult or near impossible.

There will be tough competition for food, water, and shelter, so you’ll have to fight for basic necessities. You’ll probably also meet scary and terrible bad guys who are intent on killing you for being in the way, or eating you because you’re in the way and it happens to be lunchtime.

This doesn’t sound like a very good environment for children, now does it? I thought not.

But how can you guarantee protection and shelter, at least during the apocalypse and in its immediate aftermath? Well, you can’t (sorry). You might, however, have a better chance of having shelter and supplies if you build a bomb shelter and keep it well-stocked. Keep in mind, though, that a bomb shelter would have to be built before an apocalypse—as in, you’d have to start building now.

Continue reading “The family bomb shelter: yay or nay?”