Nothing is useless (except learning Klingon)

Studying a humanities degree adds almost nothing to your post apocalyptic survival chances.

An appreciation of poetry, understanding dissent in terms of music or achitecture, or plans to take it into English later on, do absolutely nothing to defend you against psychotic robots. Also not great, is the way that studying as an adult student takes away time and resources from obsessive planning. £700 of money that could have gone to buying a gasmask and filters spent on furthering my education! 15 hours a week that could be spent on practicing how to get out of the house quick gone on learning about Pugin!

However, I am a big believer that nearly ANYTHING can be manipulated into working for you post apocalypse (yes, even you, you socially-awkward, self-righteous neckbeard; post apocalypse you may actually be as important as you pretend you are!)

It’s just knowing how to swing it.

But Humanities is useleeeeess I hear the self-important science geeks cry. Sure, poetry, writing, art, architecture, religion and music are all signs of civilisation and advanced thought, but they don’t do anything YOU consider practical, so they’re useless!

Oh, dear, sweet idiot.

Let’s ignore some things, as I don’t have time to go into them in more than a brief over-view (Music art and story-telling, which became writing and poetry, have been essential ways of spreading news, information and cultural expectations since we became able to speak) to jsut think of this:

I know how to use words. No matter how important science and pure maths is, you can’t explain them without words. And without modern scientific guffins, the power is going to be with the person who can best manipulate information on their own behalf. The person who knows how art and stories can work as propaganda. The person who knows how religion can help form structure in a society.

The person who knows how philosophy can radically change the moral code of an entire people.

Me.

Humanities is only useless if you consider studying the soul of civilisation useless.

In terms of how it’ll help long term? Well, my people will love, revere and fear me as their god-queen, and everything about their culture will support it, while yours will be culturally sterile and prone to uprising.

Best to have a humanities student on your team to prevent it.